Introducing: The World's First Zombie Sensor

[home security zombie]

Burglars. Vandals. Home invaders. Ravenous fires and silent, deadly CO emissions. SimpliSafe's suite of state-of-the-art home security sensors protect customers from every imaginable danger. But what about the dangers that are harder to imagine? What about the ones that lurk around the corner — one nuclear attack, voodoo spell or mutant disease away? What about . . . zombies?

At SimpliSafe, we believe being safe should be simple — even when the world is overrun with reanimated bodies driven only by their insatiable hunger for human flesh. That's why we developed the Zombie Sensor, the world's first wireless, self-install, no annual contract zombie alarm. Using it is a snap — if a zombie enters the perimeter, the Zombie Sensor emits three long horn blasts, loud enough to drown out his pesky slobbering and grunting. Then it's up to you what to do next! We can't help you there.

HOW DOES IT WORK?

Sometimes, it's hard to tell the difference between your small band of grizzled survivors and the hordes of monstrous corpses out to devour them! That shadow lurching slowly around the corner with its arms out might be humanity's greatest enemy—or just your tired friend Andy in need of a hug. With SimpliSafe, you'll never accidentally blow off your friend’s head again! Our sensors are designed to pick up on a zombie's unique biometric profile. Thanks to innovative heat- and motion-seeking technology, SimpliSafe Zombie Sensors can detect the undead (at up to 300 paces!), differentiating between them and innocent bystanders.

SPECIAL FEATURES:

  • Optional Zombie Attractor© emits the irresistible smell of fresh brains — turn it on when you've stockpiled enough ammo!
  • Remote Arm/Disarm with the SimpliSafe App (warning: never disarm your zombie sensor)
  • Never-Drop-Dead Adhesive adhesive sticks to plywood, graffitied garage doors, corrugated metal, and more.
  • Armageddon My Money-Back Guarantee lasts 60 days or until the end of the world, whichever comes first!

Order today — before it's too late!!!

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SimpliSafe blogger extrodaniare Cara Giaimo

Cara Giaimo

A man's home is his castle, as they say, and no matter what kind of castle you have, I'm here to help you fortify it. When I'm not blogging, you can usually find me running, jamming with friends, or making strange types of ice cream.

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